ASH
"So, do you screw-heads believe I can save you from Candarian demons now?"
MALE #1
Well we thought you were fucking with us
MALE #2
We thought you were a lying prick
MALE #3
Yeah yeah, yeah yeah
FEMALE #1
All that jive about you killing demons
MALE #3
It just sounded like, uh, bullshit
MALE #1
But apparently you weren’t talking smack
FEMALE #2
Cause we saw that evil chi-ick
FEMALE #3
She was going to eat us!
MALE #2
Ax us up and then beat us (?)
MALE #1
‘Til you shot her in the tits
MALE #2
That’s right you saved us
CUSTOMERS
You saved our li-ives
FEMALE #3
You saved me and my baby and these kids tonight
CUSTOMERS
You saved us all
MALE #2
You’re the baddest motherfucker in this whole strip mall
CUSTOMERS
We thought you were a phony
On some anti-(?)
But now we see that you’re a hero
And you saved the day
Because you blew that bitch away
MALE CUSTOMERS
Ash!
ASH
Well I told you I could kill these demons
And none of you believed me
CUSTOMERS
No, no, no. Yeah!
ASH
That’s why you’re merely customers
While I’m the S-Mart employee
CUSTOMERS
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh yeah!
ASH
Cause I’ll kill what looks even slightly evil
Who knows who the next victim will be?
CUSTOMERS
Not me!
ASH
Cause I shoot
CUSTOMERS
Shoot!
ASH
And kill
CUSTOMERS
Kill!
ASH
And saw
CUSTOMERS
Until!
ASH
We need a clean up on aisle three
CUSTOMERS
You are the ma-an
ASH
I bitch slap evil with my one good hand
CUSTOMERS
You’re our hero
ASH
I shit down Deadites like they owe me dough
CUSTOMERS
Ooo-ooo
ASH
I saw that demon try to ruin your shopping day
CUSTOMERS
Shopping day
ASH
So I grabbed my twelve gage and I blew her away
CUSTOMERS
Blew that bitch away
MALE #3 / OTHER CUSTOMERS
That’s right you blew / Blew that bitch away
Blew that bitch away-ay / Blew that bitch away
You blew her through speed a rite (?) / Blew that bitch away
You blew her like I draw team (?)
CUSTOMERS
Blew that bitch away
MOST CUSTOMERS
We used to hate you and your lyin’ ways
REST OF CUSTOMERS
Lyin’ way-ays
MOST CUSTOMERS
But now we changed our minds and see
ALL CUSTOMERS
You’re okay
Because you blew that bitch away-ay
